Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction Challenge. June 22, 2017 prompt: In 99 words (no more, no less) write a story that involves a dream. This action could have happened while awake, such as daydreaming, or make up a dream when asleep. Go where the prompt leads as it could be a nightmare or just fond memories or ambition.
This is #2 and fictional, although a very similar theme to the first.
©Sascha Darlington
Visitations
I feel gentle fingertips caress my temple, wake to his brown eyes fastened on mine, concern etched in them. His breath, hot upon my cheek, once would have been enough.
“Are you getting up?” he asks, a whisper.
“I need a little more sleep,” I say. He nods, kisses my brow. I almost pull him to me, to have him close.
I’ve never told him that sometimes she appears in dreams and her laughter clutches me. I sleep hoping to dream of her.
I think I hear him say: “Please come back to me” before I slide into slumber.
end 6/23/2017
Sascha Darlington
Nice idea and story. I wonder if the impact on the reader would be more effective if; she had a name and was somehow connected to him. Just a thought while reading.
Thanks, James. I should probably have done the name. Details are always so tough in word constraints when you want to get an idea across, but I guess that’s part of the challenge. I appreciate your comments, as always. 🙂
It is heartbreaking, and really beautiful at the same time.
Thank you. 🙂
😀
Beautiful melancholic piece AND artwork 🙂
Thank you. You have alas created a monster. I may never put up a regular picture again. 🙂
Monster is a relative term (especially with mine hahaha). You’ve really nailed it, congratulations, and I’m so pleased I could introduce you to it.
Soon I shall take over the world with my art muhahahaha…or however they do it. 🙂
I like how you use the dream state to show the disconnect between the couple, both lonely and longing. Well-written to capture that moment in 99 words.
Thank you. I very much appreciate that! 🙂