Stop! In the Name of Love #amwriting

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Thanks to Rochelle for Friday Fictioneers!

Stop! In the Name of Love

“10 minutes more,” Sean said.

Yippee. My feet dragged. Burning targeted both heels, which would be blistered and bloody.

I collapsed on a picnic table. Every muscle ached, even ones I don’t think belonged to me.

He pitched the tent, which I wished were a cabin. With a tub. And ice cold chardonnay.

The sun lowered. Loons yodeled. Crickets and katydids chorused. Fear accelerated my heartbeat.

After making a campfire, Sean wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “Thanks for this.”

I leaned into him, my pains forgotten. Unconvincingly, I said: “Camping yay.”

Compromise. Maybe the marriage counselor was right.

 

end

Sascha Darlington 3/23/2018

 

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51 replies »

  1. Let’s wait till the morning before passing any verdicts, she still has to fight off the thousands of mosquitoes and insects, in addition to biting cold and howling winds 🙂

  2. Great little story leaving me perplexed. How far do you go to keep a one sided relationship going? There is so much going on here behind the words, loved the complexity.

    • Thanks, James. I think this is a two-sided relationship. With another 100 words, I could do the other side. His beer loving self having to tour a winery or attend a romance book festival or follow her around a wool festival…. 🙂

  3. Been there with the muscles and bloodied heals after hiking. Destroyed a brand new 100$ pair of shoes which back in the day was expensive. Had to climb into a tub of hot water to soak them off my feet then cut my socks off. It was for “him” and I loved it, just not the pain. lol I so equate with this. Very well written!

  4. I am sad that Sean was blind to her pain( though you haven’t specifically mentioned that part) Also, it’s sad with we have to pay a price to stay ‘happy’ with another person. I just hope that the compromise isn’t one-sided. Great story, sadly true for many couples in marriage or in ‘love’.

    • I don’t think she openly complained, but I do think he understands because he goes about setting up camp while she sits. I think compromise is important as long as it’s something a person doesn’t mind doing or that it doesn’t in some way harm them.
      Thanks, Moon! 🙂

  5. I’m deeply suspicious that the compromise will all be on her part and not on his. I note that your story gives him a name but not her, which may or may not be significant. But she’s really trying – as you show us with the magnificent line ‘Unconvincingly I said “Camping yay.” ‘
    I hope she gets to enjoy a hot tub and chardonnay later in the holiday!

  6. Compromise works both ways – hope he checks them into a five star hotel for the next trip. Good story. I would be dreaming of the hot tub and Chardonnay for sure!

  7. That’s a pretty big compromise. Although I adore camping and have whittled my tent pitching time down to about fifteen minutes, I’m not sure she can keep it up.

  8. Compromise is indeed essential in any long term relationship, but camping? She really wants this thing to work, doesn’t she? Great dialogue through this Sascha, very real

  9. there’s this quote from patricia ryan madson that says, “if something is not to your liking, change your liking.” it should work in this situation. 🙂

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