I Give You Xanadu
My once fiancé promised me Xanadu, a home of notable wealth, modernity, and style, a place to keep me happy with everything I could possibly want, except for two: him and children. The first was not said although the second was.
Edward was married to his work, and I would be a mistress with a gold ring on my third finger.
“I give you everything. What more could you want?” he asked, frustrated by my procrastination.
You see, I loved him. He could be funny, creative, charismatic, inventive, a perfect partner. However, months into our relationship as we grew more comfortable, I saw less and less of him.
“I own companies, dearest. I employ thousands. They depend on me for their livelihood. Would you rather I spent more time with you and fired all of them?” And what does a person say to that without sounding, or being, selfish?
I cannot say he was not a good man. He was loyal and dedicated. He did indeed look out for his employees, always taking their needs to heart, and here, for me, was the crux. My needs could not be fulfilled by possessions. Passionate conversation, lovemaking, and companionship were my Xanadu. And those moments I spent with him, just two people in-sync, were the happiest of my life.
In the months since I walked away, I have wondered if I will ever be so happy again.
Was I wrong, dear reader?
Sascha Darlington 4/27/2018