Thanks for joining us again at Cilantro and Sage. The stories are linked by occurring at the same place. Some have recurring characters. They are fiction. Thanks! 🙂

Yelp, Damn Yelp

Kitchen prep time. Zeppelin blares from the speakers. Ewan likes to think it is like clockwork, a well-oiled machine with everyone doing their bit. And then Kate drags a step stool into the fray, stands on it, and holds up a carrot. Oh, for the love of Christ, what now? he wonders.

“Look at this,” she implores. “It’s the lowly carrot.”

She bites into it, chews. “Eaten raw, it’s sweet with an edge. Roasted, it’s very sweet. Boiled. Well, damn, that’s sad, right? How mundane. But if you glaze it, voila. Maple syrup? Honey? Butter. What about bourbon? Not so mundane. Add fresh tarragon and you have something that is tasty, so tasty for a side dish, but not mundane.”

She glances around at all of the faces staring up at her. “Never mundane. No food is mundane, not if done right.”

She jumps off the stool, drags it with her as she exits the kitchen leaving her crew to stare after her, some with gaping mouths, and then at Ewan who shrugs. He knows they know what it’s about. That damn Yelp review. Highlights included “mundane sides” and “vomit-worthy fusion.” They knew it would happen. It was just a matter of time. You can’t ever please all people. Everyone knew Yelp just gave bored, entitled prats a place to vent. Those who habitually left bad reviews hardly ever left a good review anywhere. Maybe they never had a good time anywhere.

“Okay, show over,” he says, hoping it is. With Kate you never know. Or he never does. She’s professional enough to keep it for later and direct it at him. Just the thought sends him to the bar for a shot of Macallan’s. He can almost hear his father gasping: “sipped not gulped, boy.” Oh, but his old man never got a chance to meet Kate. Definitely gulping.

end

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Glazed Carrot Recipes

This is the one I use, except I frequently forget the lemon juice, like last night (oops):
Glazed Carrots

Brown Sugar Glazed Carrots

A little bourbon glaze? Here you go. (No, I’ve not tried it.)

Bourbon glazed carrots